Lies

In my dream,
It would always end up so perfect.
Though you weren't my reality,
I became engulfed in this illusion.
So as I hug my pillow tight,
I would let your arms sweep me off the floor,
Drink in those words,
And stick your voice into the further reaches of my heart...
Because that's what I can only do,
Since there is no way I can ever talk to you,
Touch you,
And be special to you.
So I hide a part of me,
By folding those feelings in half,
Whenever you're around.
But the more I'm reminded of your existence,
My chest fills up with pain,
Until the empty urge starts growing into stronger yearning.
Back in the room,
I would draw up my knees and cry...
While realizing how lonely it is without you.
All my insecurities were driven into my mind,
But now, I wonder if you would care,
If I needed you this much.
Upon letting my eyes close,
I knew it would never be the same,
Because deep down inside,
I still want the real you to comfort me.